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[nineteenfortyfive]

[Claire frowns. She's never liked hiding this from anyone, but after the whole witch trial disaster, she can understand. There's a long pull from her glass before she decides that it's a conversation she and Jamie should have in private, later.]

I have a feeling you can't throw a stone at Lallybroch these days and not hit a Fraser.

[givingback]

I'd like to see it if you decide that's possible.

[ She doesn't know how to solve this problem, so she drinks more of her wine. She came here for a reason though, and that was meet Jamie, to get to know him. The rest of the family can wait for now. ]

So, I know you're a printer but what do you print? And how did you become a printer in the first place?

[backlashing]

Lallybroch? [Where else, Jamie?] Oh, aye... aye, we'll have to make a visit.

[Jenny might kill him even if he couldn't have predicted this ever happening. That already has him shifting a little uncomfortably. Her question--a fair one--has him shifting a bit more.]

It's a long story. Are ye sure?

[Stalling. He knows it's obvious and that's why he doesn't look at Claire.]

[nineteenfortyfive]

[And, of course, Claire picks up on it. He's not jumping at the opportunity to explain much of himself. What was he hiding?]

We do have time. But I'm sure you haven't eaten supper yet. [She knows he hasn't.] How about you, Bree? Hungry?

[givingback]

[ Everything she's saying seems to be wrong, so maybe, she decides, she shouldn't say anything else for a while. Instead, she nods and smiles about supper, making a sound of confirmation rather than actually open her mouth.

If they could go back to dramatically reuniting that'd be great, because holding her while crying was honestly less awkward than trying to know the right thing to say. ]

[backlashing]

Food. [He looks slowly between Claire and Bree. Food. Right. He's hungry, he knows, but he's also in so much shock that he can't feel his stomach. Awkwardly, he rises to his feet.

He doesn't want to let either of them out of his sight but he has a feeling Claire wants a word.]

I'll go see what I can scrounge up. I won't be long.

[A brief smile with the promise, and he goes to the door despite it being the last thing he wants.]

[nineteenfortyfive]

[Jamie knows. Claire doesn't want him to go, even if it's just downstairs, but Bree comes first. Maybe they all need a breath.

The moment the door shuts, she's moving before Bree, crouching before her seat so that they're eye level. Both hands cup her face.]

Sweetheart.

[She knows when something is wrong.]

[givingback]

Am I doing something wrong? I didn't mean to come and make everything worse for you. I'm sorry, mama.

[ All of that comes out in a rush, like she's been waiting to say it. ]

I don't know what to do or say.

[ Should she have come? Would it have been better, easier, if she'd stayed in 1968? And these thoughts don't even touch what she's ignoring for now, that she has a father she wants to get to know but isn't sure how. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

Oh, Bree. No. What makes you think that? He's just in shock. It's natural. He's happy, like he said. I can tell. He wouldn't lie to you.

[... he's just omitting the truth to the both of them, but they'll find out later. Claire's thumbs stroke over Bree's cheeks, gentle as can be.]

I saw his face when you touched him. I've never seen him so glad.

[givingback]

Just knowing that no one's going to believe a lie, but no one's going to believe the truth, either. And I sort of stick out with an American accent.

[ She hadn't really noticed until Jamie obviously had. ]

I believe that he's glad. I believe if it was just the three of us and nothing else, it would be better.

[ That gentle touch of Claire's thumb actually brings on tears she didn't know were right there. ]

And what about daddy? Would he feel hurt because I'm getting to know my real father, or would he feel pushed out again?

[ She doesn't say that to hurt Claire (even if it might), but there was no way at all to anticipate how conflicting this might be, at least not to Bree. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

Most of the people here have no idea what America is like. We can say the people there are different enough that you picked up a strange accent. The rest... we'll figure out. We always do.

[If they could find Jamie through time and distance, they can do anything. She tries a smile, but it's gone as soon as Bree begins to cry. All she can do is lean up and take her into her arms.]

Frank would want you happy. If this is what you wanted, I don't think he'd fault you for it.

[Would he hurt? Oh, yes, just like thinking about Frank makes Claire hurt. But she does want to believe that Frank, wherever he is now, would understand ultimately.]

[givingback]

[ The only constant Bree has now is Claire. She's never changed, she's always going to be her mother, and she takes comfort in that for now, breathing her in and closing her eyes for a few minutes. ]

I want to be able to talk to him. But I tried with family and talking about Lallybroch and what he does. None of that worked.

[ She pulls back and wipes at her eyes, sniffling. ]

Maybe you can tell him he can just ask me questions. It'd be easier, maybe.

[nineteenfortyfive]

We don't know all of the details of his past twenty years. It's... I doubt he's talked about it in full with anyone, and so he's struggling. But he will, I know he will. We just need to be patient. It's not because of you.

[She helps Bree wipe at her eyes with her sleeve.]

Why don't you tell him about... that summer we took you horseback riding? Jamie loves horses. He'll be glad to hear that you do, too.

[givingback]

[ Bree takes a deep breath and lets it out, managing a nod and a small smile. ]

Okay. I can do that.

[ She thinks. She hopes. She likes how happy he looked, how happy her mother looked, and she wants to do something or say something so right that they look like that again. She's putting unnecessary pressure on herself, but these glimpses she's seen have been completely fascinating, and she wants it to keep happening. Everyone deserves so much happiness, and if she can keep that happening, she wants to. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

You're doing wonderful, darling. There's no wrong you can do. But you might make him cry again if he sees you've been.

[She smiles, kissing Bree's forehead and giving her a tight squeeze. Jamie cries a fair bit. Bree will see.]

[givingback]

I don't want him to know I have.

[ If he's going to cry she doesn't want it to be because she is. Put a pin in that angst for later. Wiping at her cheeks, she takes a deep breath and lets it out, sniffling and attempting to dry up her tears. ]

There, better?

[nineteenfortyfive]

Better. You really do look like him. Can you see it, now?

[Especially when she cries. But she keeps that comment to herself, fixing Bree's hair as she's wont to do.]

[givingback]

[ She can't help but smile at that. ]

I can see it. I look like you, too, but we have the same eyes. Obviously the same hair. I really want to get to know him better. I think I just want all of the surface stuff and awkwardness to be over with so we can get there. You know what I mean?

[ She understands it will take time, but that doesn't make her any less eager to have it happen. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

I do. [She curls a piece of Bree's hair around her index finger.] He's scared, Jamie. He'd never admit it outright, I don't think, but he is. He doesn't want to... be too much, or overwhelm you. If he doesn't need to worry about that, you should tell him.

[givingback]

[ It will probably overwhelm her, but right now, she wants to make sure he isn't afraid to talk to her. And if she needs to have a moment with her mother, she knows she always can. So for now, not understanding how deep these feelings could go, she decides the best thing to do is tell Jamie not to worry, that she's fine.

And right now, she is. ]

I'll tell him. I know he's worried, but it will all be okay. I'll make sure he knows somehow.

[nineteenfortyfive]

He'll appreciate it.

[Another touch to her hair, and then Claire glances at the door.]

He's probably taking his time so we can talk. Do you want to go and fetch him?

[Maybe it should be Bree. If Claire can't relax enough to let her go downstairs in a small building on her own, she'll never be able to at all.]

[givingback]

[ Bree nods and stands, taking a deep breath and letting it out, smiling softly. ]

I'll go make sure he knows we didn't disappear. I'll be right back.

[ She kisses Claire's cheek, then leaves the room, closing the door gently behind her and going down the stairs to find Jamie, peeking around a corner because people apparently just hang around outside of rooms, and she doesn't want to talk to anyone else. ]

[backlashing]

[James Fraser isn't an awkward man, but he's certainly looking a little awkward as he stands around with a tray of food from the cook from the kitchen. He could have gone upstairs a while ago, bring the plates of meat and fruit and cheese and bread, but he can't imagine what sort of conversation they're having up there. God forbid he intrude on the two women.

So, he decides to wait a bit, giving a polite nod to other patrons.

He's about to nod to a young lady when he realizes it's Bree and he practically jumps.]

Brianna. Something the matter?

[givingback]

[ She really can't help smiling at him endearingly, shaking her head. ]

Nothing's the matter. Mama just realized you must have been giving us a chance to talk.

[ Might as well say this now, then. Bree steps toward him, her smile a little smaller now but still directed at him. ]

You can talk to me. Nothing is off limits. I promise, it's okay.

[backlashing]

[Oh, busted. Jamie manages to look embarrassed--that obvious, was he?]

Ye go right in for the kill, just like another woman I ken. [Her mother. It's been strange but wonderful seeing Claire being a mother, as brief as the interactions have been. He always knew she'd be a good one.]

The last twenty years haven't been easy for me, Brianna. [An admission, though he wonders how much she knows, or how much Claire could know.] Sometimes I dinna have the words for the times that have passed, but I would like to share them with ye--and ye mother. Eventually.