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[givingback]

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[nineteenfortyfive]

[She holds her again, just as firmly, rubbing her back. Each time she pulls away she only wants to wrap her up again, but she must dress, and so Claire steps away to grab the clothing. Showering alone didn't go so well, so pardon her for sticking around to help Bree into the pajamas.

Her own dress is heavy and wet, and she wrings out the skirt as best she can, but she'll just have to get out of it once they're back in the room.

And as much as she'd like to leave Bree's shift here, she supposes someone might panic if they walked in and found it, so she folds it up to take with.]

Okay. We can go, now. Come here.

[So she can once more have an arm around her as they walk back.]

[seventeenfortythree]

[ When they return and the door opens, Jamie stands and as soon as he sees Bree his heart sinks. She's been crying, he knows it, and he takes in Claire's appearance as well, not sure why she's soaking wet exactly, but assuming now that for some reason she had to get into the water with Brianna. ]

Lass?

[ He asks the word softly, stepping hesitantly toward Bree. ]

[givingback]

[ As soon as Bree sees him, something wells inside of her, and she swallows heavily. ]

Da.

[ And then she closes the distance between them, wrapping her arms around him tightly. He told her to call him that, and it feels right. He was right: it's simple. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

[Terribly, Claire wonders if this acceptance would be so easy if not for the trauma. Would she seek Jamie out for comfort and affection? Claire's not sure, but if there's anyone good at comforting in this room, it's Jamie. Her da.

Turning away so as not to weep herself, she tosses the soiled shift away, out of sight, before she begins to shed her wet clothing. The stays and the skirts kept her shift dry, at least.

She'll tell Jamie what happened in the shower later. No need to embarrass Bree now.]

[seventeenfortythree]

[ If it meant taking away what happened to her, Jamie would trade away this moment, work harder for Bree's affection. But he can't take it away, he can't change it, he can't fix it. All that he can do now is hold her, his babe.

When she can't see his face the tears fall, a look on his face of horror at the memory of what he saw. But as she pulls back he makes himself breathe. ]

How do ye want to sleep this time, mo leannan? Each of us on one side again?

[givingback]

[ Bree nods and waits as Jamie gets into bed, back against the wall, so that she can get in as well. All that leaves now is Claire, and as Brianna focuses on her she doesn't even realize she's drifting off to sleep already, her movements hypnotizing and her own body so exhausted. She's out in record time, body relaxing into the bed. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

[This time, when she slips into the bed, she tugs Bree onto her chest some so that there's just a bit more mattress space left for Jamie. Their daughter is small enough that her weight doesn't bother Claire. And, this way, she can keep a hand on her back, feeling her breathe.

She turns her face to look at Jamie, worried, anguished. He hurts, Bree hurts, they all hurt and there's nothing she can do about it.]

[seventeenfortythree]

[ When Jamie speaks, it's a hoarse, broken sound. ]

I saw the blood, Claire. When she stood. Christ, it was so much...

[ He can feel the bile rise in his throat again, but with nowhere for it to go he swallows it back down as his eyes burn. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

[Oh, Christ. Claire squeezes her eyes shut for a long moment, willing away the image of it herself.]

She's all right. I took care of it. She's not in pain.

[seventeenfortythree]

[ Jamie wants desperately to hold his wife but he can't displace his daughter. He won't. So, he settles for reaching out to press his hand to her cheek, stroking her skin with his thumb tenderly. ]

Mo chridhe. You're taking good care of her. It's what she needs and ye can give it to her. Comfort and strength.

[nineteenfortyfive]

So are you.

[She can give him a small smile, at least, proud of this man that already knows how to soothe their daughter.]

In the shower, she was washing herself and suddenly started weeping and scratching at herself. Said she felt his hands on her.

[seventeenfortythree]

[ Jamie's hand stills on her face at that.

He'd just stopped crying, too. ]

It gets worse before it gets better, Claire. Ye ken that.

[ He doesn't know how much more of this pain his heart can bear. It feels as though there's a struggle to even breathe. ]

The nightmares will come.

[nineteenfortyfive]

[Her hand leaves Bree's back because right now, her husband needs her. Fingers curl around his, squeezing, before she kisses his knuckles.]

How are you, my darling?

[Her other darling. She knows he's not well, because none of them are. But it's important to ask.]

[seventeenfortythree]

[ He knows he promised, but he doesn't want to speak about himself right now and how he is.

But he did promise. ]

I broke a bowl when ye left. Threw it into the wall.

[ There's no evidence of it, save for perhaps a soupy smell to the floor. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

Could have gotten away with that one.

[She teases, no mirth in her voice. Setting his hand down on Bree's back, so he can feel that she's alive and breathing and there, she spends some time stroking his hair, from his hairline and backwards.]

[seventeenfortythree]

I've never felt so broken, Claire.

[ From a man who has been broken in multiple ways over his years. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

And that's all right. She's our baby. Someone, some monster, hurt her. God, but she's strong. Stronger than you and I combined.

[Somehow, greater than the sum of all her parts.]

That's saying something when you're the strongest person I know.

[seventeenfortythree]

[ Jamie takes solace in his wife's words, finding comfort in them. Their daughter is strong. She'll heal and she'll grow and she'll bloom again. He has to believe that. ]

I ken exactly the man who hurt her and if he ever wakes, I'll be there to wrap my hands around his throat and send him to the next life.

[nineteenfortyfive]

[It's a promise. Claire's hand stills in his hair.]

I told you once that I would help you bleed Randall. The same goes for this son of a bitch, too.

[seventeenfortythree]

I'll show him to ye. So ye ken who he is on sight.

[ It's a promise; they will kill whoever needs to be killed together. Whether Randall wakes or Bonnet. They will take care of it for the safety of their family. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

Did... after Culloden, when you knew Randall was dead for good, did it give you peace?

[She's never asked, because she doesn't ask about Randall, and she doesn't ask about Culloden. Until now.]

[seventeenfortythree]

[ Jamie's jaw tightens for a moment, the question one he hadn't expected. He doesn't think about either of those things deeply if he can help it. ]

Nothing gave me peace after Culloden, Sassenach. I was glad, perhaps, that Randall was gone to join the Devil himself, but for years I didna feel anythin' other than anger that I couldna die.

[ It's the truth, terrible as it is. ]

[nineteenfortyfive]

And now?

[Her fingers resume their previous task, combing through his hair. She can't hold him or reach to kiss him right now but she will. Eventually.]

[seventeenfortythree]

Ye came back to me, Claire. It was the first time in twenty years that I felt my heart beat again.

[ His hand reaches out so that his fingertips can lightly brush her cheek before dropping to rest on Brianna's back again. ]

Killing Bonnet won't take away the hurt but it will be satisfying, and he willna be able to hurt anyone else. Same as Randall.

[nineteenfortyfive]

What do we do until then?

[They might never get a chance to hurt Bonnet. To make him suffer for harming their baby.]